Meg wouldn't trade her Cape Town experience for the world

Coming home has been so much different than I thought it would be like. I thought I would have reverse culture shock the minute I stepped off the plane and be weirded out by everything. This only happened when we were walking to customs and everyone around us seemed like they were walking at lightening speed, which was a terrifying reminder that I was back in a country that took time very seriously. However, the first couple of days seemed easy, like I fell right back into everything. And then the realization hit that as of now, I am here for good, not going back soon, stuck. That was pretty daunting.

 Of course I miss the people a ton, but I have been in contact with some of the CMES staff which has been really nice. I miss the daily routine, and shockingly enough I actually do miss living in our crazy crowded house. Going from being able to always talk to someone to living basically by myself has been a hard adjustment for sure. But above all, I think the hardest adjustment had been dealing with this feeling of suffocation. I got so used to being able to go the beach or hike a mountain or even paraglide whenever I felt like it. There was always a sense of space and freedom living in Cape Town that is definitely not the same here. Living in New York City makes me miss and think about the mountains at least twice a day.

It has been interesting noticing the difference in people’s attitudes also. No one in New York smiles at you or really even looks you in the eye. A few times people have struck up conversations with me on the subway, but my sisters say this is rare and only because I probably look like the most approachable one. I have no problem with this, I feel bad for majority of the people who live here who move place to place with headphones in and heads down, I cant help but feel like the are missing out on so much of life. It is also really interesting to be around people who don’t always understand your love for nature, or why you relate everything back to social justice without even thinking about it, or why you keep mentioning the phrase, “when I was in South Africa…”. Avoiding that last part has proven more difficult than I imagined it would be. It’s so hard not to talk about the trip because that has been the last four months of my life! Also people ask about it all the time, so that just makes me think about it even more!

I think in general the transition back was easier than expected, but also more lonely than expected. I miss the feeling of feeling like I am living the life I want to be living. I miss the feeling of living a life with purpose and not just moving through the motions. I miss the freedom that Cape Town provided, the adventure, the excitement. But even though I miss it, I wouldn’t trade the experience for the world. I count my blessings every day that I had this trip in my life, and cannot wait to continue to see how it shapes me and my life to come.

Meg's South African smile