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| Sunset from Lion's Head |
For the past few
weeks, my blogs have been defined by the finite amount of time I have left in
Cape Town. 3, 2, and now 1 week remains
until I am back on that 15 hour plane ride across the Atlantic. I continue to come to new realizations and view
my time here in different ways. Very
recently, perhaps my greatest accomplishment was accepting that my experience
was, in many ways, not what I expected.
Prior to coming here, I had talked to previous participants who’s faces
lit up when they talked about Cape Town.
I envisioned spending every single day experiencing a feeling of
absolute bliss, and anticipated feeling at home within weeks of my
arrival. What I failed to comprehend,
however, was that it is entirely unrealistic to expect that, over the course of
three and a half months, anyone could be elated every single second of the
day. For me, my time here, while
amazing, has been challenging. I didn’t
seem to feel the sense of home that the other participants had talked about,
and it took me a few weeks to truly begin to enjoy my internship. Things were not perfect as I had imagined
they would be, and I felt very disappointed with myself that I did not face every
day with the elation that lit up the faces of the past participants I had talked
to. I was filled with the constant
anxiety of comparison, and I worried on occasion if I had made the right choice
in coming here or was doing something wrong.
However, after
taking a step back, particularly after my lessons learned in Johannesburg, I was
able to see what this program has provided me what I would never have been able
to achieve sitting in a lecture hall in Storrs. I learned a wealth of medical
information, was able to witness a number of procedures, and experienced the
integral role of caring for a patient’s emotional well-being. I met people who would go out of their way to
help me when they had so many of their own challenges to face. I learned the importance of informing myself
of my own government and exercising a responsible vote, as so many South
Africans died fighting for the right to just be treated as the same level of
human as someone like me and to be able to vote themselves. I learned so much in this one semester that
can’t be measured by a numeric scale. So,
while I may not have ever felt that Cape Town was my home or always felt
intense joy about being here, it will always hold a place in my heart as
somewhere where I did a significant amount of growth, and I will always have love for this
incredible place.
So, in conclusion,
I would say that my experience was certainly not what I expected, and
completely different from those of my co-educators and past participants, but I
now fully realize that that is completely and entirely okay. It doesn’t lessen the significance of my time
here or my gratitude for the people I’ve met and the things I’ve seen.
It seems unfortunate
that I seem to be falling the most in love with Cape Town in the final couple
of weeks of my stay, but I’m soaking in as much of it as I can before next Saturday. This morning, I finally went to Bo Kaap and
viewed the brilliantly colored houses there.
Tomorrow, I plan to hike Devil’s Peak, the final of the three mountains
that comprises the skyline behind my house.
I go back and forth every day about whether I am more excited to return
home or wished I had more time here, and I don’t think I’ll reach a resolution
before I leave. While Cape Town may not
be my home, it will certainly always hold a place of significance in my heart.
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